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Exquisite Malaise

by Parade Chic

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Alex Berkley
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    10 song album including album art and liner notes.
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      $7 USD  or more

     

1.
Black Sheep 03:15
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Our great narrative, pale and deceived (Don't let the world in, don't let in the world) Well the kid in me is disgusted to see What happened to all of our dreams So, what happened to all of the dreams? (We chased through our youth, our best years in the world) Every hour counted and sold depletes Incredible how time bleeds In light of real life inside this machine If I'm doomed to be a sheep Then I'll be the blackest you've ever seen We were carnival prize goldfish (A clear, cellophane plastic bag is our world) Coveted, carried, praised for a moment Then left wasting, pacing circles in a bowl What if they told it to us straight from the start That life is a compromise And no, not the noble sort, but more a form of forfeiture Giving much and taking little What if we knew that all along? Would we be better off? Or would we just be flocking sooner? In light of the darkness inside this machine If I'm doomed to be a sheep I'll be the blackest you've ever seen Fuck real life and fuck the machine If I'm doomed to be a sheep Then I'll be the blackest you've ever seen
2.
Parties 05:47
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Is it very warm in here? Or is it just my fucked up homeostasis? Nah, I’m good, I don’t need a drink Though it seems you’re already off to the races Okay, fine, I’ll play along So tell me something, what’s your bliss? How do you get to sleep at night, How do you quell the crisis? Parties? What are these?? Parties… I’m sorry to get so heavy I know we only just now met But these are questions we all have to answer And you just haven’t impressed me yet Alright, I’ll take that drink now My mouth is dry and my palms are starting to sweat I’ve never been big on small talk Never learned to take what I could get Parties? What are these?? Parties… My attention wavers Drawn by a yell out in the streets While your anecdote-du-jour Reaches the end and again repeats So the moments pass While somewhere within the liquor heats I’ll soon be home, undressed and alone Under the influence and the sheets Parties? What are these?? Parties…
3.
Trouble 07:07
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Kickin' shells in to the surf, one by one A quiet existential crisis in the sun If this crooked castle in the sand Is all I've built after all this time Then I'm in trouble And I'm not ready I study my reflection at length And carefully catalogue every change Hair and doubt have both grown out The mirror's dirty and the room's the goddamn same And I'm in trouble And I'm not ready Reeling, I'm feeling depressed again I'll lie down in my clothes and rest and then Staring at the ceiling I start to drift off Born upon waves of a complacent sea And I'm in trouble And I'm not ready I sure could use a little good news
4.
Rage and Riot 04:20
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Some days The world won't turn Some people Never learn My insides Wrath and churn When this whiskey Has lost its burn I will rage and riot It's your right To be wrong And you've sure Invoked it all along But today You'll fall before the throng Cause this march Is at least one man strong I will rage and riot
5.
Cicada 07:00
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Bounding hearts and escalated breathing Reaching for each others' hands in the evening Nowhere to go, and no one, nowhere, to be But our souls were flush and pure as honey But that was then, this is now I've found new ways to let you down I'm a shell of the self I used to be Like one of your cicadas plucked from the bark of a tree And it's fucking with me Pounding hearts and frenetic breathing Withdrawn and distant but inside screaming Pacing hallways and fruitless errands Grasping and clenching and wringing my hands But that was then and this is now I've found new ways to let you down I'm a shell of the self I used to be Like one of your cicadas plucked from the bark of a tree And it's fucking with me I'm flicking pennies into fountains Each time the surface clears enough to see My reflection and the countless Wishes wasted, hopeless hopes, and derelict dreams
6.
Miasma 05:51
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I'm sick Oh, no, I am not well Can a bender span months? Perhaps ebb and swell? I dwell Most days now at the bottom Of my own freshly dug holes Of every pile, and of the bottle Oh I've tried I've tried all that cognitive bull But it's a fan to a house of cards And the deck was never, ever full And besides Every bit of scrappy progress Is two-timed and beguiled By my careening prancing madness Apologies If I'm a poisonous presence A choking asthma A noxious atmosphere Apologies If I am miasma Oh ho! I'm feelin' it Squinting here in the dark Those Caribbean cocktails Just turned the villa wall art Into a mask of death I beckon, then flip it off Paranoid and reckless Untethered and aloft J'ai perdu Ma joie de vivre Et maintenant je chanté En mauvais francais Now standing here Passed out on my feet I pirouette and sashay And wake half-dressed Drooling in the back seat Apologies If I'm a poisonous presence A choking asthma A noxious atmosphere Apologies If I am miasma Oh exquisite malaise How each breath shakes When I can't separate Triumphs from mistakes This is a crisis Of dueling identities Or maybe all this nonsense is, y'know The forest for the trees Still I drink Up any mystical remedy Or hokey dogma That promises release So just let me steep Oh my god, just let me stew Maybe let me simmer off Shit, just give me a few Apologies If I'm a poisonous presence A choking asthma A noxious atmosphere Apologies If I am miasma
7.
At Aphelion 04:37
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Dear times together that I can't feel you in Color me an unhinged reeling chameleon Oh, but bad poetry and feckless apologies Still leave me cold and distant, at aphelion Festering within Have I given you pause? Do you smart with resentment? Do you seethe, rancorous? Have I given you pause? Am I a butterfly or just a caterpillar Or is all of this actually my chrysalis? Oh, but what if?! what a frightening prospect If I long ago wasted my metamorphosis Just to become this Have I given you pause? Do you smart with resentment? Do you seethe, rancorous? Have I given you pause?
8.
AA (Anesthetic Aesthetic) 04:19
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Are we choreographed From conception to the epitaph? Is your so-called identity real? How how how how do I feel How do I deal With this Anesthetic Aesthetic Mon cher Lacan C’est la jouissance Cut the strings and stop the show Free self and limb from this faux Geppetto A decision most corporeal Now how how how do I feel How do I heal From this Anesthetic Aesthetic Mon cher Lacan C’est la jouissance I was feeling like a subject: numbered and dropped into a maze With chemicals conflagrating through the veins And implanted purposes deep in the brain And dead ends and dead ends and dead ends and naught to gain Refrain, refrain refrain, refrain Anesthetic Aesthetic Mon cher Lacan C'est la jouissance I’m here, it’s now, I’m me The beauty and the calamity This was never meant to be An act of fucking bravery
9.
Graveyards & Cemeteries 06:44
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Shaking down the turnpike in a flannel state Swallow and contemplate When Brenny tells me the difference between A graveyard and a cemetery Suddenly I'm spinning and spinning and spinning and spinning All of the lives I lived back when Are lying buried beside the persons I could've been And we're spinning and spinning and spinning and spinning I've been in trouble I've been full of rage Been bent over double Strings cut center-stage What the hell's it all for If not to change If not to change If not to change The wind off the ocean done braided my hair All up with brined, sea-salted air Turn my back on the complacent sea I've got better places to be Suddenly I'm flailing and flailing and flailing and flailing All of the lives I lived back when Are floating, drowned beside the persons I could've been Leave them, leave them, leave them, leave them I've been in trouble I've been full of rage Been bent over double Strings cut center-stage What the hell's it all for If not to change If not to change If not to change
10.
Most Days Now 06:18
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I wake before the sun most days now And in the silky violet light I lay Scrutinizing all of my saboteurial ways Yet scheming how I'll betray all my resolutions today I've been a few times round the existential block I've spit time and again in the face of the ticking clock My albatross, my pleasure in despair must finally wane If I just want to feel, not to feign I sleep before the moon most nights now But as I drift I wax with hazy enlights I may require readers for my hindsight Somebody please get me blinders for all of this insight I've been a few times round the existential block I've spit time and again in the face of the ticking clock My albatross, my pleasure in despair must finally wane If I just want to feel, not to feign Witness me, bide with me While I plié round a chasm Absurdity of absurdities Mais donne moi le dernier mot Please give me the last word I think I'm ready now I'm finally ready now

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released July 9, 2021

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Parade Chic Buffalo, New York

Parade Chic is the musical moniker of songwriter, multi-instrumentalist, and neurotic, Colin Griffin. His compositions convey a profound dissonance; brooding and surreal, they blend elements of psych, electronic, chamber, and art rock, and have drawn comparisons to Tame Impala, Arcade Fire, and The Zombies. Parade Chic's dizzying sophomore album, Exquisite Malaise, is out now. ... more

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